A sarcastic “thank you” to the Feminist Movement
Thank you, Feminist Movement, for creating generations of women who think that in order to be truly fulfilled, they must “have it all;” for telling our girls that they can do “anything boys can do, even better;” for spreading the message that a women’s reproductive system is not for making a new human life, but for using as leverage against a government apparently dead-set on intruding upon it.
And thank you, Feminist Movement, for equating the revoking of publicly-funded birth control with women dying horrific, bloody deaths in the streets, or living miserable, child-infested lives if their “pro-choice” rights are taken away.
Thank you for making a precious life a burden-a death sentence of an exciting, intellectually stimulating existence. Thank you for portraying stay-at-home moms as dull, oppressed, submissive and unable to speak or think for themselves; the very women trying to raise decent, thoughtful, strong and independent children.
Women who treat their sons with as much love and adoration as their daughters. Women who encourage all children to reach for the sky, dream big, and find their purpose. Thank you for letting retailers know that because a woman has as much right as a man to be promiscuous, lewd, and in-your-face, that they need to fill their stores with sleazy, inappropriate products.
And that the ultimate goal is for women to whip the male species up into a twitterpated frenzy, then loudly inform them that they don’t appreciate being ogled. Thanks for going the extra mile and fighting for laws that punish those oglers, or the men who are forward enough to actually comment on a woman.
And thanks for fighting against laws that actually protect the innocence of our daughters. Thank you for teaching our young girls that boys are stupid, dads aren’t necessary and moms are interchangeable.
Thank you for creating more anger and sexual frustration in our society by diminishing the importance of healthy, monogamous relationships. Thank you for creating the illusion that any old familial set-up is as good as the next. Thanks on behalf of all the kids who grew up without a mom or a dad in the home because someone bought into that belief, and learned too late that maybe they shouldn’t have.
Thank you for not recognizing real women. The women who choose their battles carefully, but fight valiantly for their cause. Women who make their own way, without screaming about their rights. Women who recognize that all cancer, is a sad and difficult ordeal, that all assault is wrong.
Women who look at the world and want to use their God-given talents and unique womanly characteristics to make their mark, quietly or boldly, but never shrilly, and never as an act of revenge.
Women who revere good men and their special qualities, just as we expect them to revere the good in us.
So thank you, Feminist Movement, for all that you have done. Pat your own self on the back, you lonely, bitter hag.